I have so much to say, but the words don't seem to flow.
We've been away. We took the caravan, which after three days seemed to shrink. It was cold. We stayed at the Marysville caravan park. It has the most gorgeous stream running through it.
We spent a day up at the mountain, Lake Mountain, tobogganing. It was fun, but exhausting. Lots of walking uphill. The drive up through the hills was so picturesque and at times breathtaking.
We built a snowman. The girls had a great time. Brett couldn't help himself but add the boy bits to the snowman. Such a man thing.
I took photos, which are on my laptop. I will hopefully share them on wednesday when the laptop comes back from the fix it shop. It died the day we got back. I feel like my right arm is missing!
I had lots of time to think, sitting in a car for two days, which also seemed to shrink. I let things that happened yesterday, last week and even ten years ago seep into my present thoughts where they compound and fester. I need to leave them in my yesterdays and move on. Forget them. Don't let them ruin my today.
I do lots of deep breathing to keep myself calm and centred. Sometimes it doesn't work and I find myself crying and stressing over nothing, and the next minute I am fine. This is happening much less.
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| Onward and upward |
I like this post, the clarity of the words. Though it is also a little disturbing (in that it will be itching at my brain, like that one I read a few weeks ago and needed to respond to - the guy the hid his depression from his wife). I think you capture the intrusive nature of thoughts perfectly.
ReplyDeleteNice pics too...
Oh Alicia, I hope you have improved x. I am wondering if our age group is prone to this? I recognise so much of it in myself too.
ReplyDeleteLake Mountain looks great. Apparently it is not too far from my home but I have never been.
I was thinking of you when we were driving home and the photo you posted on IG of snow on the mountain looking towards Warburton :)
DeleteIt is good news to hear that you are having less moments of stressing and sadness, I can relate to letting things get to you and fester, I have been pushing a lot to the back of mind but just recently they have started invading my sleep at night. Just keep swimming and I'm glad you had a nice weekend in the snow x
ReplyDeleteIt's gonna take some time, I will just have to take it easy and float on my back sometimes ;)
DeleteI have moments, too, when I have too much time to think and I let things from the past plague my thoughts. It looks like a magical get away, otherwise. Onward and upward. The past is just that. Passed. x
ReplyDeleteExactly. Have to leave it behind x
DeleteI think it's a 40 plus age thingy, reflecting and dwelling on the past as we get older. I can totally relate to that and have so many regrets...hope you can put yours behind you. Time in the snow with your family certainly would help. Love the snowman! :)
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautiful trip. Having fun with your girls in the snow. It's taken me a lot of work, tears and heartache to get to a point where I am much better at letting things go rather then dwelling on them and allowing them to affect me to a point i get so down and upset and consumed by it all. I hope you continue to improve and learn how to cope better. Maria. xx
ReplyDeletewww.mummygoesmad.com
Your photos are magic xxx
ReplyDeleteThank you Rae x
DeleteThis looks like a beautiful time with your family and very chilly. I hope your computer is fixed soon although enforced time out from tech is always good I find. I am so glad you are aware of your thinking and what you can do. It is amazing how things from the past can annoy us when they shouldn't , they are over and done. I think everyone does this at some time or another.
ReplyDeleteMy computer is dead. It would cost more to fix, so I'm looking for a new laptop. Luckily I still have the PC and got the photos off the dead laptop.
DeleteThe 'monkey mind' can be a challenge to ignore sometimes. The positive though is you react with deep breathwork... AWESOME! As you say these times of the 'monkey mind' getting their own way are becoming less and less because you know how to deal with it. Loved the photos and reading your words. Have a great week ♥
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